I recently got a new job doing marketing for MakeItWork.com so I have already been Facebooking & Twittering for the past eight hours…. So I should have gotten beyond my fill of self gratification for the day right? But as I’ve already mentioned, Facebook & Twitter are not enough; they merely touch on whatever thoughts/ feelings you choose to put out there, without allowing you to explain or “work through” them, the way writing does. So I guess what I’m seeking by writing this blog entry is not just self-gratification (OK maybe like 90% of it is that), but I am also seeking a way to express my feelings fully in hopes that by doing so I will somehow understand my emotions, in turn making them easier to deal with…
So what the hell am I talking about? You’re probably wondering how does the Caribbean tie into all of this…? So two days ago a very good friend of mine moved to the Caribbean. He and I had only been hanging out since August, BUT we became pretty much inseparable from September till now because neither of us had “real jobs” (I teach surfing year round, if you can call that a job: SurfwithVanessa.com) & he worked on the Sunset Kidd Sailboat here in Santa Barbara (where we met). So all we did was road trip up and down the Cali coast, visit our families, buy lotto tickets and talk about all of the cool stuff we could do if we actually won. (We agreed to the plan of buying a yacht, paying our best friends each a couple years worth of salary to hang out with us & sailing around the world, going to all the best surf spots and places we’ve always dreamed of traveling to).
Because my friend, like most of us, can not yet afford to buy his own boat, he decided to do the next best thing and get a job working as a crew member on a boat sailing first in the Caribbean and then on to wherever the job could lead… Before he left I wrote him a letter and in it I confessed that I have been blessed to have many amazing friends but there have only been a handful of people in my life that that I have connected with on that deeper level where you both know you just get each other & appreciate each other and he was one of those people for me… I explained that after spending so much time together, going on our adventures and all our talks about life & relationships, I have really grown to love him very much- not in a creepy, doodle his name on a notebook way, but in a lasting, sincere, friends forever way…
This was hard for me to admit & even harder for me to let go of as I dropped him off at LAX last Saturday at 4:30am. I was and am excited for him but I miss him terribly already (aah but at least we have facebook ha ha)… So tonight, when I found myself beyond busy with a million things I should be doing for work, and still feeling that ache in my heart and loneliness that comes when you no longer have someone in your life that you had grown so attached to, I decided to do what I do whenever I need an answer for anything… Umm, yeah, I googled it (of course) and these are a few offerings I found…
Q: Why do we miss people?
Because when they are around you just don’t realise how much of your life they take up and when they’re gone the void is huge. ~ AnswerBag.com
Sometimes, when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated. ~ Lamartine
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