Can You Fill This Out Without Being Annoying? (No)

Can you fill this out without lying? You’ve been tagged, so now you need to answer all the questions HONESTLY. At the end, choose at least 8 people to be tagged. Don’t forget to tag me!

To do this, copy this entire message, then go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, start a new note, paste these instructions in the body of the note, delete my answers, and type yours. Easy!

Next, tag 8 people (in the right hand corner of the app). Click publish (at the bottom). Have fun!

1. What was the last thing you put in your mouth? A .38 special. Don’t ask.

2. Where was your profile picture taken? Only Hello Kitty can tell you that.

3. Can you play Guitar Hero? Who is that?

4. Name someone who made you laugh today? Glenn Beck.

5. How late did you stay up last night and why? I still haven’t gone to bed: watching Glenn Beck marathon.

6. If you could move somewhere else, would you? I would move my bowels.

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks? Yes: his name was Lefty.

8. Which of your Facebook friends lives closest to you? That would be my husband except I am planning to unfriend him because certain parts of my life need to remain private (i.e. that I suck at BrainBone)

9. Do you believe ex’s can be friends? I’m sure if they all got together they would get on famously.

10. How do you feel about Dr Pepper? I am currently suing him for malpractice, so not very favorably.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard? This morning (still watching Glenn Beck).

12. Who took your profile picture? What is it with you and your profile picture obsession? I told you, ask Hello Kitty!

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of? Ok, seriously, you need to get some therapy to deal with your photography fixation.

14. Was yesterday better than today? No. Yesterday is still in a time-out for being naughty.

15. Can you live a day without TV? Well I wouldn’t DIE without it. Could you be more hyperbolic?

16. Are you upset about anything? Yes: I could really use more Glenn Beck in my life.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it? Worth what? $17?

18. Are you a bad influence? No, I am really good at influencing badly.

19. Night out or night in? Pantsless.

20. What items could you not go without during the day? Need I say it? Glenn Beck. Also, rawhide.

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? Well, if I was in the hospital I couldn’t really go visit someone, now could I?

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say? It was an invitation to visit hothornyfelons.com. I took a break from the site to complete this questionnaire.

23. How do you feel about your life right now? Mandy Patinkin is dreamy!

24. Do you hate anyone? Yes: the photo obsessed nazi who came up with this thing.

25. If we were to look in your FaceBook inbox, what would we find messages about? Should I just handover my social security number right now too?

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass? Why, yes, if of course you were not testing for GHB, methamphetamine, heroin, or Flinstones’ Chewable Vitamins.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before? Usually when people call me I assume they get all the numbers in the correct order so I would say that is perfect.

28. What song is stuck in your head? If I had something stuck in my head I would be at the ER getting it surgically removed instead of sitting here, wouldn’t I? Duh.

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be? The tooth fairy.

30. Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50? Sure! Do you have any for sale?

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow: Finish this long-ass questionnaire. Or maybe take a photo. You would like that, wouldn’t you?

32. Do you think too much or too little? I don’t drink nearly enough.

33. Do you smile a lot? Yes, especially while watching someone whose first initial is Glenn and last initial is Beck.